Winsome

I read an article today that described someone as winsome.  

I had to stop for a moment.

I like that word.

It has a certain mid-century sound to it, the kind of word that seems like it belonged in the vocabulary of newspaper columnists, professors, and thoughtful grandfathers. It is the kind of word I wish came naturally to me. I suspect that if I could casually work winsome into a conversation, people might think I was a little smarter.

Of course, that's just my ego talking.

But that's a word for another day.

Merriam-Webster defines winsome as "generally pleasing and engaging because of a childlike charm and innocence." Other definitions include charming, sweet, cheerful, and delightfully appealing.

What struck me is that winsome isn't really about intelligence, wit, or accomplishment. It isn't about being the loudest person in the room or the one with the most impressive résumé. It's about possessing a quiet quality that naturally draws people toward you.

We've all known people like that.

They aren't necessarily the funniest or the most successful. They simply have a way of making others feel welcome. They smile easily. They listen well. They don't seem to be trying to impress anyone. Their kindness feels genuine rather than calculated.

You enjoy being around them.

It made me wonder if winsome is one of those forgotten virtues. We spend so much time trying to become more productive, more knowledgeable, more influential, or more persuasive that we rarely ask whether we are simply pleasant to be with.

Perhaps that is why the word feels so refreshing.

A winsome person doesn't win arguments.

They win hearts.

That's a distinction worth remembering.

Maybe my goal shouldn't be to add winsome to my vocabulary.

Maybe it should be to add it to my character.